I never do pay-it-forwards, or any kind gesture with hopes of getting it back. If I went in with that attitude life would not bless me the way I need it too. It’s something you have to do selflessly and not selfishly. However, when you do need help, those kind acts come come back ten fold!
Let me go back a few weeks to when this all started to go down hill.
My hubs had been at the same job for nearly 7-years. With job security not being at the forefront of our nation anymore, we always knew that someday he might venture in a new direction, but we always thought it would be him leaving. Well, life threw us a major curve ball and he was let go. He is the bread winner in our home. When we heard the news our hearts sank and the fear, denial, and every other stage of grief set in for the next few days.
With 2 months left on our lease and hopes of finally buying our first home together, our moods and attitude were shattered. We had been planning this purchase for nearly 4-years and now, and now it’s gone. Even when he finds a new job we have to wait until he has had it long enough, on paper, to be approved. So we rent again…sign.
The stages of grief are quite exhausting and I see how people can get trapped in a negative bubble for a real long time. It is hard to escape when your whole world seems to be crashing down.
Then it all started to happen, well it actually started on day one. All those fabulous people in my life, came with open arms. I don’t even mean with money. In fact I would not even take money from most of them as they barely make it, but even better, it was their understanding and friendship that has helped us get into the healing stage.
We received $50 from a stranger who is now a friend. We received so many kind gestures and words and offers to help with food and extra curricular activities…my heart is full. Every time someone offers, no matter how small to them, it seems the world to me and I am finding myself crying out of love and not out of fear anymore.
We still have a long way to go. In fact we have decided to try and open a local business so we will struggle and be dirt poor for a while longer but in the future we will be our own bosses and responsible for out own future. The only thing that will hold us down is the small business loan we need but with the way everything is working out, if we take a leap of faith, then this should come too when we need it.
So with all the awesome people in my/our life it has made this leap of faith seem more doable.
We have a long road ahead and it will all turn out. I want to send a huge thank-you to all those in my life that make it so good. Family, friends, and even ones I barely know that showed their love to me, so easily, with their kind words and gestures. In a world that seems so impossible at times, it still seems so good. I will never stop letting those that make a difference in my life, know what they have done for me. My 100 letter project just got bigger. The 100 letters I wrote last year really made an impact in my life this year, I swear by it. Now, every time someone needs a letter, they will get it. I bet by the end of my life there will be thousands of gratitudes sent. How awesome is that?! If you have not idea what I am talking about I have an old post about it here.
Have a wonderful day. My heart is full today and it is suppose to finally be 60 degrees! Yay warm inside and out!