Random Thoughts

I have been struggling with my positive thinking over the last 5 to 6 days and it is really bothering me.  I can’t quite put my finger on what is wrong exactly but I will catch myself being mad and try to change my out look and I can for a few minutes but then I am back to angry.  Anytime when money is needed I do get stressed but have been getting better changing my attitude, but the last few days have been harder then ever.  I am not sure if it is the stress of having enough to cover the extra groceries etc for Christmas or if I am PMSing or what.  I don’t always know when I am PMSing as I had an endometrial ablation done last year and do not have periods anymore (the best thing I EVER did believe me)!  Anyway, I am going to try 100 times harder this week to change my mood.

Something I have noticed big time and more proof that the law of attraction DOES work….I have had everything fall apart over the last few days because of my shotty attitude.  Seriously, I have been dropping things, tripping on things, stubbing my toe more and fighting with my daughter more.  This is NOT what I want and that is the whole reason I have decided to change my outlook in the first place.  I have got to get my head in the game and get back on track TODAY.

UNIVERSE:  I am giving you my negative thoughts to take today and I WILL have a great and wonderful day with my family and not stress about such little inappropriate things like money.  Tis the season to remember how awesome our families are and how lucky we are to have them.  This is and will be my focus from now on.  Other things do not matter and will not get me down anymore.  I will have a Merry and Wonderful Christmas!

I am saying this out loud every day, 2-3 times a day if I need too!

OK I am venting today.  I was so looking froward to tacos and bought 2 boxes of hard corn shells, got them home, prepared the meet, cheese etc and opened up the taco shells to put them in the oven and BAM, 100% broken.  I am serious.  They were the last thing I did, food was on the table and I have no shells!  This is so frustrating.  I did not drop them or anything so they cam from the store shelf like this.  Ugh!  I wold have taken them back but by this time it was not much of a choice as I had dinner prepared and we were all starving!

We ended up having moon shaped tostadas (sp?).  It was he best thing I could think of and we did not waste the shells this way.

I am buying an extra box next time so I can take them back, this has never happened to me before!

I tried but it is just entirely to soon after my surgery to do the P90X.  I am thinking that it is probably not a
good idea to push myself especially when I am still having some pain where the incision is.  My new goal to start P90X is going to be February 1st, 2011.  I should hopefully be able to afford the pull up bar and bands by then to and make a better “go” of it.

I am not going to put off working out totally, I am going to continue with my plank position and arm weights and walking until my butt feels good enough to work out!

I can’t wait to be able tos tart this in Feb!

Who says you can’t use side walk chalk when it snows outside?  Not me, we had a great time with it.  Love it that it washes off so easily!  We had a good snow storm last week and after we finished marking up the entire back yard, we were not ready to go in yet so we drew all over the fence.  Now my daughter thinks I am the bomb!  We had a lot of fun!

Today was plyometrics which is disc 2 of P90X well….made it about 10 minutes and my butt did not like that too much.  Too much too soon after surgery I guess.  I did not push it as I don’t need another surgery so I turned it off.  I will have to come back to that one in about a week or two.  Today will be plank position, some arm eights, and cleaning the house.  I shoveled the snow that only took 20 minutes but I could tell I was getting a good work out.

I wonder how long I can do plank after not doing it for a couple weeks cuz of surgery?  Let’s me see I will go do that now….

OK so I made it only 70 seconds.  Butt did not like that much after 60 seconds either, blah! Oh ya I am positive now.  Whihoo 60 seconds.  60 seconds will happen 3 times today.  Just because I can’t do it all at once yet does not mean I can’t break it up!

Will try P90X disc 3 tomorrow!!

I meant to post this after black Friday but forgot about it.  I have to be the first to say I used to HATE shopping and would NOT go black Friday shopping to save my life.

I still would rather do other things than shopping but don’t hate it anymore, just would rather be somewhere else.  I have noticed that my outlook on people and myself has changed my attitude towards many things.  I used to get pretty anxious and almost angry when I would think of going Christmas shopping at anytime.  I have not felt that way all season long and I have done a lot of shopping this past 2 weeks.

I did not go black Friday shopping but for the first time since the mid 1990’s I actually told my friend I would go and did not get all anxious about it.  I got up, made my coffee, and was ready to go and she called and cancelled due to her child being sick.  Was I mad at her since it was 6am and I had been awake for an hour?  NO I was not and past me would have been a little ticked off.  I saw the positive IMMEDIATELY and I am not kidding.  I said, “cool, this means I have a couple hours of me time with lifetime TV and my coffee.”  She seemed taken back that I was not upset, and I really was not upset.  I was not even relieved, I was simply, “OK” with it.  This is a big deal for me and I am loving this new me.  I still have a long way to go but am on the right track getting there!

Got 1 more gift to take back and I am done!  Bring it on Christmas 2011 I am already ready for you!

FYI:  I meant to post this yesterday but ended up christmas shopping so I am a day off! P90X day 2 will be today!

Wow day 1 of P90X was a little brutal.  It was arms and chest so my butt was safe from being sore after surgery but I can feel a burn.  I do not have bands or a pull up bar so I used weights instead.  Here are my little weight friends. lol

I can’t afford to buy the bands a pull up bar so close to Christmas but since I can feel the burn pretty good I know that these will work!

I will do this again tomorrow!

Measurements:
Well I have definitely gained some inches due to the surgery.  Even though I knew this was a possibility (a good possibility) it is still a bit depressing to see the numbers.  Here they are.

November 19                   December 14           Loss or Gain
Bust:  41                           41                            0
Under bust:  35 1/2           35 3/4                      G-1/4
Waist:  40 3/4                   41 1/2                      G-3/4
C-section:  42                   42 1/2                      G-1/2
Hips:  44 1/2                     45                            G-1/2
Thigh:  25                          25 1/4                      G-1/4
Arm:  12                            11 3/4                      L-1/4

My first instinc is to freak out and be depressed and go eat something!  i can’t do that, that is a step backwards I can’t afford to take.  I just went through surgery and a slump with feeling good so what did I expect.  I have to keep my attitude strong and take this as a learning experience.  I can reverse this back to loss real quick. I feel good now and I am back on the saddle.

What I learned?  Well, see how fast we can get out of shape and how long it takes to get into shape.  Don’t stop!!!!

Cool!  Just found these on amazon and they are more affordable now so have these here to remind me to get these come the new year!  This will pump up my work out and not too shabby on price, yay!

Iron Gym Total Upper Body Workout Bar $27

I used to go to the bathroom minutes before working out, again a few minutes into it, and once or twice more before the work out was done.  Most my work outs were between 20-60 minutes and this was very frustrating. 

It has been a week since my stage 2 InterStim surgery and I did day 1 of P90X today.  It did not hurt and I did not have to take a bathroom break once.  in fact it has been 45 minutes since I did the work out and I am just thinkning “hm I think I need to go to the restroom.”  This is so cool!  I am so excited to be able to do the work out and then some and not have to take the breaks.  This will allow me to burn more calories and maybe even attend a work out class again away from home.

All I can say is YAY!!!