Did I lose my identity when I became a Wife/Mom?

I have struggled with this time and time again as I was/am a very career oriented woman.

Looking back:

• I moved away from everything I knew to a state 1800 miles away to start a new career.

• I met my husband who lived 70 miles north of me and moved to him when we got married as he had a daughter who was under 18 and I did not want to take her away from seeing him as much as possible.

• I got married had a baby, quit my job and became a stay at home Mom.

• I LOVE being a stay at home Mom but suffered, and still a bit but better, with my identity as a career woman.

There is my history. I am my worst enemy when it comes to this as the only person who thinks that the identity is/was gone is me.

I have always strived for the degrees and the recognition but never understood that I could be totally fulfilled raising my kids and putting my career on hold.

For the first few years I resented my husband pretty much daily and felt like he took something away from me….my identity. What I have come to realize and am still realizing every day is that he did not take it away I just have a new one and that will change over the years as our kids grow and we all venture into new things.

I have realized as well, about myself that this is mostly a selfish attitude I am portraying. I am worried too much about me and was enjoying the wonderful life that is sitting right in front of me.

I have spent so many so many years focusing on me and my career that I have had a hard to seeing the other side of things.

I have finally started embracing my life, today’s life, and stressing over what I had, or chose, to give up. CHOICE being the key word.

It has taken a while but I am seeing the light and enjoying my kids, my husband, and beginning to celebrating my life!

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Grill mania and loving it!

My neighbor Ann from our old neighborhood decided to buy us a BBQ grill this last weekend, can you believe that?  I tried to tell her no numerous times but in the end we have an awesome new 5 burner grill in our back yard.  I have wanted a grill for years but we are so stinking poor it has not been in the cards.

I love my neighbor Ann, and not just because she buys us things.  She is elderly and I have always checked on her, invited her to parties, Christmas dinner etc.  At first it was only because I was worried, as she has no family around, and I never knew how long it would take out of state family members to know something was wrong in the horrible event that something bad happened.

After a very short time of doing this I had come quite fond of Ann.  She is twice my age but I am my family consider her family and we absolutely love her.

I think buying things is her way of showing appreciation and love. I tell her all the time that is now what she needs to do, but who can tell an 83 year old woman, who is very smart and alert, what to do?

Anyway, I have been grilling everyday and plan on it again tonight!

I love my grill! Plus BBQing instead of frying is so much better for you!

Thanks Ann you rock!

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Walking again!

I know, I know! After yesterday, why the heck am I going out again today, right? Well…it is a lot cooler today and I know that it will only benefit me in the long run to walk. Besides my kids love to go so how can I be selfish and not get them some fresh air.

I am getting a bit of cabin fever today and who knows how much walking weather we have left. It is almost mid September.

I think I will go a different route today and see what other destinations I can find. Still do not know everything I am living by!

I am pumped, yah!!

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I found the secret today!

To the woman that helped the Mom out with 2 kids at the post office on stroop road in Kettering, OH, you are my hero and thank you!

I did find the secret big time.

I decided to go for a mile and a half walk, one way, to the post office to mail off some letters that had to be post marked by today.  I made the venture with my two kids in the stroller in 90 degree weather.  I had never walked there before and the map said 1/4 miles so I figured “how hard can that be?”

It was a long humid walk and when  got about .2 miles away from the post office I realized that I totally forgot my wallet.  ARGH!  I only had $7 in the bank but it was going to only cost me about $4 to send what I had to send.  I had just over $1 in change in my pocket.

I decided to just go into the air conditioned post office and see if I cold sent at least one envelope and have them weight the rest and let me know how many stamps to put on them for later that day.

I walked in and there was a woman standing in line in front of me and my daughter said, “my Mommy forgot her wallet at home.”  I was embarrassed that she told her so I quickly said, “I just walked here from shroyer ave and totally forgot my wallet, I was not too smart today.”  I just acted like it was not a big deal and smiled.

Step back:  For the last .2 miles into the post office I told my daughter to say with me “universe, we need $4 to send our mail.”  I looked at every little nook and cranny during that .2 mile walk for any little shiny change I could find. I found nothing and I figured that the universe was not going to answer me.”

Back to the rest of the story:
The nice lady paid for her letter and stepped back while I went up to the counter.  I told the postal worker that I just needed to know prices as I left my wallet at home and I was a 40 minute walk away so if she could write the price on the letters I could purchase stamps and kroger and send them later.

The nice lady came back to the counter and said “please just send the letters I will pay.”  Of course I said “no” but she insisted and handed the postal worker $5.  I just sat there and thought to myself “wow, this is what I have been reading about, the secret.  I asked and I received.”  I thanked the lady and asked for her contact info to pay her back and she just shook her head and said “it’s OK.” and she left.

My letters are sent!

I was a little upset gong into the post office that the universe was not letting me find the money on the ground on the way in but now that I think about it, it had to happen the way it did.  If I would have taken money off the ground then someone else would be missing it and it could possibly mean I was taking the last money they had.  Because the lady gave me the money, she was not going without something important because she would have not paid for it if she couldn’t.

This has been a good day and if I ever run into that wonderful lady again, I am taking you to lunch!

Thanks!

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Walk was a nightmare!

The 3 mile round trip walk seemed uneventful in the beginning but was not so uneventful at all!  The GOOD part, which I am grateful for is that I burned a ton of calories.

It took me an hour and 15 minutes to do it.  It was ridiculously hot and humid and a lot of little up hill inclines.

I got about .2 miles away from the post office and realized that I forgot my wallet.  No kidding!  I finished to the post office and was inside and a very nice woman spotted me the $3.45 to send my mail.  She would not let me get her address to send it back to her.  I wish i knew her name because I would send her a big thanks with the money back and a ton of homemade cookies!

The walk home was hard but in the end we made it back!

Whew, I am hot and tired now!

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Heading out for a 3 mile round trip walk 2 the post office. Could drive but might as well burn some calories. Make the errand seeter!

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Visualizing today!

I am not getting frustrated that we only have $7 in our bank account for a week at 2 days.  I am not grinding my teeth and losing sleep over it.  I am telling the universe today that we are going to receive enough money to make it through this week.

I am going to visualize a sweet check in the mail that I was not expecting.  I am visualizing my excitement when I check the mail and BAM check!  For my Canadian followers, cheque!

I am staying happy and excited and not going to let this lack of funds rule my life!

OK universe I am doing my job now you do yours!

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Sushi was a big hit!

I took my homemade sushi to my new job Saturday morning and everyone thought I was the domestic queen “that must have taken  you forever!”  “You did not make that?”  Seriously, it was awesome.  It is so easy and people think you are the gourmet queen!

The only thing I did different was leave the seaweed paper in the whole sheet and roll big rolls and then cut them into small pieces and lay them beautifully on a serving tray.  In the middle of the tray I poured some sushi soy sauce and I was done. 

the rice took 50 minutes to cook but everything else took me all of 20 minutes to prepare so it was not bad at all.

Wish I would have taken a picture, but I was rushing and did not think about it!

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Crosswalks

OK so I have been walking everywhere since we moved to our new rental as everything is within walking distance.  I have had a lot of trouble with crosswalks lately.

I am a Mom who walks with 2 kids in a double stroller and NO ONE stops for me at the crosswalk EVER!  Seriously!  I have to cross the road, at this same crosswalk, daily, and every day I literally have to walk out and stop the traffic myself. 

The first day I waited 15 minutes and people were running through the crosswalk and some were speeding.  There were families in vans not stopping, hello people, would you want someone to stop for you?

This just amazes me.  I can’t believe how much in a hurry everyone is now that they cannot even stop for someone to walk a crosswalk, especially one pushing to young kids in a stroller.

I literally have to wait for enough clear traffic just to push out a bit so the cars have time to stop for me.  It is ridiculous!

Please stop for people at crosswalks!  I will stop for you too!

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Homemade Sushi, yum!

I love to make sushi as it is my favorite food.  I could eat it everyday!  This is the ONLY time my family gets white rice.  Anything in moderation is OK, so I don’t feel bad.

The rice is sushi rice you can buy at any grocery store that has an Asian isle.  I have tried the  brown sushi rice but have had a little trouble getting it sticky enough.

The rice I make in a rice cooker or vegetable steamer.  It works so much better than the stove top.

Mix a little rice vinegar and about 1TB of sugar in the rice.  Alter it as you see fit for taste.

Mix when rice is hot and serve immediately as cold sushi rice is not good and spreadable.  If you are dong rolls rather than my buffet style you still need to use the rice before it gets cold.

My cousin from Japan taught me how to do rolls this way, thanks Kima!  This is my favorite way to eat sushi at home and my 4 year old loves it!

Cut whatever vegetables you can think of in strips.  You will also notice I have egg salad (made with only 1TB of light may, little mustard and salt and pepper to taste.

I forgot to cut the imitation crab when I took the picture so that is the only thing missing from the pic.  I also attached pics on how to roll it.

The seaweed is bought in larger sheets and I just cut each piece into 4 equal squares.  you have to cut about 1/4-1/2 inch off of it first to make it square.

I like this way because you can make a different tasting roll each time and the kids have fun making them. 

You can also flip the seaweed over and roll it the opposite way so the rice is on the outside after the roll.

Hope you like it!  If you try it let me know what you think!

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